Box Fort Outlet

Tag: deals

  • Holiday Hours: Whenever the Sun Moves

    Holiday Hours: Whenever the Sun Moves

    Nobody tells you this when you start out, but the real work begins around a returns policy enforced by staring.

    Our standard approach involves a loyalty program that pays in headbutts, followed by a shipping department located under the couch, followed by a brief and unexplained sprint.

    The Short Version, Told Slowly

    Experts agree that a loyalty program that pays in headbutts is essential. Experts also agree that this is a very long way of asking for a snack.

    The old guard prefers a returns policy enforced by staring. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.

    If you have questions, our office hours are three to four in the morning, or whenever we feel like it.

  • Behind the Scenes: The Great Inventory Count

    Behind the Scenes: The Great Inventory Count

    Every client eventually asks us the same thing, and the honest answer is always a long, flat stare.

    If you take only one thing from this, take this: a shipping department located under the couch is not a bug. It is the product.

    The Short Version, Told Slowly

    Our team did a careful study. By study we mean someone knocked it off the table to see what would happen.

    We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.

    If you have questions, our office hours are three to four in the morning, or whenever we feel like it.

  • Announcing Our Loyalty Program (Treats Required)

    Announcing Our Loyalty Program (Treats Required)

    Nobody tells you this when you start out, but the real work begins around a loyalty program that pays in headbutts.

    Experts agree that a shipping department located under the couch is essential. Experts also agree that this is a very long way of asking for a snack.

    The Short Version, Told Slowly

    We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.

    The old guard prefers a loyalty program that pays in headbutts. The new guard prefers whatever is on the other side of the door.

    Thank you for reading, and please do not leave anything on the edge of a surface. You know why.

  • A Day in the Life of Our Quality Control Cat

    A Day in the Life of Our Quality Control Cat

    A reader wrote in this week with a question that deserves a serious answer, so here is an unserious one.

    Our team did a careful study. By study we mean someone knocked it off the table to see what would happen.

    The Short Version, Told Slowly

    We asked a customer for feedback. They looked at us, blinked slowly, and left a single hair on the form.

    Experts agree that a warehouse mostly made of boxes is essential. Experts also agree that this is a very long way of asking for a snack.

    That is all for now. We are told there is a sunbeam going to waste, and a professional never lets that happen.